


Guilty

by NunuKim182



Category: South Park
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-10
Updated: 2020-12-10
Packaged: 2021-03-09 20:41:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,686
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27992436
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NunuKim182/pseuds/NunuKim182
Summary: Red feels guilty about avoiding Kevin. And she loves him so much.
Relationships: Red/Kevin Stoley
Kudos: 5





	Guilty

"Red! Good morning!"

"Red, did you see the Justin Timberlake concert yesterday?"

Two of the most popular kids at school, Wendy and Bebe, came up to me. They're my friends whom I met in Third Grade and they’re popular and cool. All the boys and girls looked up to them. Speaking of me, I am in the cheerleader team and I too am one of the hottest girls in my class. I had to maintain my dignity and show myself off to most popular people. I could not break my fantasy about myself and-

**"Hi, Red!"**

While I was talking to my friends, I looked back and saw Kevin Stoley, my childhood friend and the class-famous geek. The faces of my friends are not unusual. Everyone's expression said, ‘Do you hang along with that nerdy kid?’

“Red, can I talk to you?” Kevin asked. I quickly ignored him and continued talking with my friends, focusing on my their conversations to avoid thinking of him as his voice began to grow smaller and smaller. Looking back a while later, after my friend's conversation had finished, I looked around. He was not there. As my friends forced me to class, I couldn’t stop thinking about Kevin.

**I am the worst person in South park.**

* * *

After school, I hurried back home, shrugging off a story to my friends. When I got home, I pulled out my Star Wars DVD from my drawer and put it in my PC. I watched each of the scenes of the eighties’ movies, with their crude CG Effects. I felt calm in my mind. I liked Justin Timberlake and pretty, shiny things, but I also liked Sci-Fi related things and cosplaying. However,I knew that if I showed my nerdy side, my reputation would fall to the bottom of the school, so I had to act like I’m not a nerd.

I was really envious of some kids who showed their nerdy ways. Yes, they've lost their popularity, but they got to be absorbed in their own favorite things. If I could’ve lived without seeing other kid’s reactions of mine...

I couldn't stop thinking about Kevin Stoley while watching the movie. Our first meeting was when we were four. His dad was a huge movie fan, so we’d always go to the theater once a week, or rent a video at home to watch a movie together (mostly a space opera movie). I didn’t understand the scenes or the plots. I was too young, but we always focused on the action and when they fought with Lightsabers. When the movie finished, we’d go home and play together. I remember Kevin always pretended to be Han Solo, and I’d pretend to be Princess Leah. It was so fun back then...

I want to go back to those days.

**I wish I could talk to Kevin again.**

But wouldn't he be better with someone than a girl who acts like a two-faced Bitch?

While I was thinking about this, a text came.

[ _Hey, can I talk to you?_ ]

Clyde Donovan. He was putting on this act because he won **‘The Most Cutest Boy’** in the girl's vote. I don’t think he’s cool. He's a little dumb. But, every girl knows that Clyde liked Bebe, and yet, he wanted to see me? Does he want to hook up with me?

I thought I could meet him once, so I paused the movie and went to the place where he called, Stark’s Pond. It was the place where Kevin and I used to see the stars through his telescopes when we were in First Grade. I'm with a little, short, fatass in the place of a childhood memory. I’m the worst of the worst.

Clyde Donovan didn’t know this but he won first place because the girls altered the results so they could use him to buy shoes for them. I too altered the results. The shoes are so pretty, so I have to get them somehow.

"Red. I wanted to meet you so I could ask you, do you want to date me?" asked Clyde, pompously.

What the fuck is he talking about? Besides, I don't think he really likes me.

"Why? Don’t you like someone else?"

"Is there a reason for dating somebody? Come on, it'll be fun. Oh! And I'll get you some new shoes, too. My dad bought some good shoes today."

That was a stupid answer. He only wants to date me because he thinks you’re cute. Or did he perhaps want to make Bebe jealous? In my head, my angel and devil were fighting. My conscience was saying that I should never date with this fatass for Kevin's sake, but the other side, the sweet devil, whispered to me that I can get new shoes every day if I date Clyde.

Eventually, I had to raise the devil's hand in triumph.

* * *

The news that the Fatass, Clyde Donovan and one of top girls, Red McArthur were dating spread quickly. The girls were horribly envious of me. I knew why they did. It was because I could get brand new shoes from Clyde every day and, to be fair, the fatass kept his promise. Clyde sent me new shoes every day. But, I haven't seen Kevin's face since I shaked my hands with the devil.

I don’t feel happy dating Clyde at all. In my mind, I should have dumped this fatass and tried to see Kevin. I don't want to hear this pig's crappy third-rate drama flirting. In any situation, Kevin and Clyde’s actions always compared. When we have dinner together, when we have a cheesy conversation...Kevin always would have done better. Kevin would have made me happy. Kevin would never have done this. Already, my heart was set on Kevin Stoley, the Geeky kid.

Walking through the hallway with the girls, I noticed Kevin's face while he was talking to Bradley. Though Kevin at first glance seemed alright, looking closer, I could tell he was pretending. I knew him too well, his eyes looked dark and empty. He must be so upset and angry with me. I understand. What I did was really cheap and selfish to not be blamed form. The pile of shoes at home only made me feel like I was strangling. A reminder of my actions. I’ve had it. I don't want to date this pig anymore.

I took out my phone to text the fatass but, surprisingly, the pig had sent a text message to me first!

[ _Can I see you for a second?_ ]

Why did Clyde want to meet me now?

I went to the place where we arranged to meet, the backyard of the school. It's a place where the Goth kids smoke, so is often avoided by most people, but they weren't there today. Clyde took his time to say something, as if he was upset.

**"Let's stop dating now."**

Hell yes! I was so happy that I almost flew into the sky! I was going to say that, but if I looked too happy it would have made me look bad, I'll have a bad reputation. "Yea. It’s alright, I didn’t care for it too much," I said calmly.

"Yea, you'll meet a nice guy someday," he replied and we went our separate ways.

The Devil's Contract for that week was fortunately over. Later, when it was found out that Bebe was the one who altered the results, I knew that Clyde must have felt betrayed, lied to and had a huge fight with Bebe. But I don't care about their love affair. I had to pay attention to myself for now. For once. I took out my smartphone to contact Kevin. I had to talk to him. But, before I could text him, at that moment my hand stopped. Will Kevin ever be happy about this? Or will he get angry at me?

It was complicated. I've been avoiding Kevin because of his falling popularity and geeky ways, and I didn't know if he'd accept me, not after all this. But I certainly wanted to talk to him. I didn't avoid Kevin because I didn't like him. I just feel scared for my reputation in the school.

I'm sorry I've been acting like a dick all the time. I liked Kevin, but I couldn't send the message because I didn't have the courage to tell him! In the end, I decided to keep it in my mind.

**I'm a coward.**

* * *

A month has passed. Kevin's face has brightened up and he seems happier. Still, he hasn’t greeted me since this all began. Did he give up on me? I don't feel happy. I wanted Kevin to come up to me again. Maybe he's trying to distance himself, just like me in the old days.

It was that moment when I learned how Kevin felt about me in the past. I thought I should have told him quicker. But if I started hanging out with Kevin, everybody would think it was weird. Think I’m weird. What do Wendy and Bebe think of me?

I hated myself for thinking like a nerdy kid, like Kevin, but I wanted to be honest. I could only be honest around Kevin. I couldn't tell anyone else. But I didn't want to tell anyone else, especially not my mom and dad. I could see the answers they'd give. My mom was a redneck, so I could see exactly what she was going to say, and dad would gloss over it somehow, focusing more on the fact that I liked anyone and how I was too young. Adults are not helpful.

I have to change! I'm not going to hide it anymore! At this rate, Kevin might get further away!

When I came to my senses at that moment, I was suddenly standing in front of Kevin, breathing hard. Next to him, his friends (Francis, Bradley and Dogpoo) were looking at me with looks of confusion. Kevin's face began to turn red, his expression too looked confused. He looked at me and was at a loss on what to do. I took a deep breath and shouted at his shoulder

**"Kevin! See you at Stark’s Pond today! After dinner!"**

"...Huh?"

**“What ‘Huh?’ Kevin, I'm serious! Don't hang out with anyone tonight! See you at 7.pm!"**

Leaving Kevin alone in confusion, I hurried out of school. Heavy snow was falling in the gloomy sky. White, big snowflakes bumped into me. The snow on my hot face melted and cooled my skin. I'm sure he will come out, but what should I say? But I had made up my mind. I have to finish everything. Whatever I hear from Kevin...

The snow had almost stopped and was falling little by little. It was freezing cold. I could hear the sound of snow being stepped on from behind me. I could tell who it was, but I didn't want to look back. I wasn't confident.

"Red?"

The voice, almost similar to Craig’s, stuck in my ear. The voice that spoke timidly without confidence, becoming only confident when it was talking about Star Wars, Star Trek, and science & math. If he acted a little confident, he wouldn't have been treated like a nerd. Kevin is stupid. So stupid...

Whether he knew what I was thinking or not, Kevin approached me and began to speak softly.

"Now you want to talk to me? I've been waiting, Red. Waiting for you to talk to me again. I don't know how long I've been waiting…” Kevin blurted out the end of his words. I hated that. Why didn't he just talk to me first if he waited so long? He was speaking so confidently. I looked at him. He was blushing. It must have been because it was cold, I told myself. Nothing else. When I saw his cute, red face, my face began to heat up. I felt my heart pounding so hard. Where do I start? I sorted out all the complicated thoughts in my head step by step.

"I've wanted to talk to you, too,” I said, quietly. “I really wanted to talk with you, like how we used to in kindergarten. Like in early elementary school. I wanted to see the stars and watch movies with you again. I wanted to talk a lot about nerdy things. I wanted to stay with you all the time. I wanted...to…” My lips trembled every time I spoke. I suddenly realised I was crying and I couldn't stop. I just couldn’t stop. Hot tears trickled down the cheeks. The wind made my eyes cold. "I didn't want the others to think it was weird, so I ignored it even if you said hi to me. And it's not because I wanted to date Clyde before. He was giving these shoes to me! That's why I dated him. So... so..."

…

**“I'm sorry.”**

I felt relieved. It’s like the feeling when you take a mint candy and take a glass of cool water. How will Kevin react? Maybe he will be pissed off. Or he will leave here cursing at me saying two-face bitch, what I deserved...But Kevin was too sweet to do that.

"I already knew.”

What?...Did he know that? So...why was he being so patient and waiting until now?! I feel so guilty...

"And I'm not mad at you Red- ...No, Rebecca. I'm telling you, I was upset when you were dating Clyde, but I've never been angry with you, Rebecca Mcauther. Never have and I never will."

No...Kevin is a liar. It was a stupid. It was impossible that his oldest and best friend acted like this,TO HIM, and he wasn't angry! I grabbed him by the collar and pulled him towards me.

_**"Don't fuck with me! Tell me the truth! You're angry with me, aren't you? I've been avoiding you because my classmates treat you like a pussy! I put my status over you! Besides, I caused a scandal with Clyde Donovan! It was my own doing! Why aren't you angry?! Are you an idiot?! Get angry! Get mad!!"** _

I looked at Kevin's face, his eyes looking back at me, and slowly let go of his collar again. I just made a sudden advance at him. I grabbed him and shouted at him for no good reason. Kevin carefully opened his mouth again.

"But I don't want to say bad things to you, Red. I've liked you since I first met you in South Park, and I thought I should deal with anything you do so you can be happy. I want you, Rebecca ‘Red’ McArthur to be happy."

Every time he opened his mouth, my heart felt like it was melting. Kevin is so sweet and kinder than I ever expected.

"Would you like me, even if I acted like a dick to you again?" I said.

Kevin answered my question right away. "Yes. Everyone makes mistakes, and I like you Red, whoever and whatever you are, even if you weren’t cute.”

This is why I couldn't hate Kevin Stoley. Everybody likes me because of my appearance and popularity, but Kevin was the only kid who covered my shortcomings. So that’s why I kept Kevin in my mind. When people left and came back for me, Kevin was always by my side and would always listen to me and share my favorite things without laughing at me.

Kevin held me in his arms, without saying a word. His short height didn't cover me up, but I hugged him tightly. A moon and a few small stars were shining up above us in the black South Park sky. It was like time had stopped like this. It was cheesy, typical, and like a third-rate drama, but was perfect. I whispered quietly in his ear.

"You are like that shiny, little star in the sky. I-...I love you, Kevin Stoley.

And then, in a small but soft, sweet voice, the sweetest that I have ever heard, Kevin replied...

" **...I love you too, Red Mcarthur...** "

**Author's Note:**

> Okay dudes I translated this! plus, this is a Korean version of this fic. Enjoy, Korean Revin Fans! > https://posty.pe/b4y9xp ! And plus some Tumblr dude helped me with fixing a little math problems. I'm really thankful to them. it maked my fic more nice!


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